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Today I concluded a week of several meetings, sitting with sheriff’s along with other law enforcement, people with the inspector general’s office, concluding this morning with the United States Department of Justice Trustee which I have to say was not anything like what I ever thought it was going to be.
And so I suppose this morning started for me the beginning of a process which is guaranteed and promised to citizens of our great nation and referred to as “a fresh start.” As of today for the time being, ( for personal related matters) I am left with no credit cards in my possession, I have no personal bank accounts except for one that is “with Uncle Sam” that is called a DIP account which supposedly I am still able to spend and manage finances as I would normally but needing to make sure that exact record of finances are maintained and i give Uncle Sam a ‘gift’ once a quarter. This will at least be for the time being until there is finality to what i has become termed “my reality”.
Over the coming weeks and months the United States Department of Justice Trustee will begin examining and looking at everything I have everything, I’ve worked for, I’ve shared, I’ve saved and I’ve spent in a process they term “following the money.” Essentially it is Uncle Sam’s own version of a financial audit.
Anything that has gone out, if not sensible or for and related to my personal obligations and responsibilities, or for my direct & entitled benefit, Uncle Sam (i.e. this US Dept of Justice Trustee aka the federal government begins their own pursuit to locate, liquidate and litigate and takes back to pay bills and debts.) Many in the world have taken similar measures purposely putting themselves in such a place which apparently I’m told that I should feel good about starting today’s process. I have to say my stomach isn’t quite feeling that at ease and I don’t feel good about it. Namely because as a result of my reality, a reality I did not create and I did not choose, I’ve been left with but no other choice of voluntarily doing this for a secondary objective. This process without fail will determine if in fact if my nightmare, “my reality” and my understanding of all of what has happened is in fact true or a big misunderstanding on my part. No matter the outcome, I seem to come out ahead benefiting and finding resolve but no benefit, no matter how large or small is now and forever without irreparable hurt, great sadness and loss. A life experience that has broken much faith I have in that man can exist and love in this world mutually and equivocally unselfishly and unconditionally.
And so the coming weeks / months become a period of waiting, one where no other things matter, no other business need even be looked at for this is and will be the only thing to live and breath about me and around me until the causes and effects of such reality as mine are satisfied and exist no more. There onward and only then does life begin again; a new life, a clean slate and a fresh start of a guaranteed new me with having kept and preserved from what can no longer be taken from because its’ now kept for a solid fiscal new start….